Sledges and Anecdotes

A collection of Sledges and anecdotes found on the Web from the world of cricket. Sledging has always been a part of cricket. Even the great WG Grace did it. Once in an exhitbition match given out leg-before, he refused to walk and told the umpire: " They came to watch me bat, not you bowl". And the innings continued.

Grace's ability to stand his ground was legendary. Once, when the ball knocked off a bail, he replaced it and told the umpire: " It was the wind which took the bail off, good sir ." The umpire replied: "Indeed, doctor, and let us hope the wind helps the good doctor on his journey back to the pavilion ."

W G Grace and Charles Kortright

The best WG Grace sledge was on him, though, not from him. Charles Kortright had dismissed him four or five times in a county game - only for the umpires to keep turning down his appeals. Finally, he uprooted two of Grace's three stumps. Grace stalled, as though waiting for a no-ball call or something, before reluctantly walking off with Kortright's words in his ears: "Surely you're not going, doctor? There's still one stump standing."

Glenn McGrath v Eddo Brandes

McGrath was bowling to the Zimbabwe number 11 - who was unable to get his bat anywhere near the ball. McGrath, frustrated that Brandes was still at the crease, wandered up during one particular over and inquired: "Why are you so fat?" Quick as a flash, Brandes replied: "Because every time I make love to your wife, she gives me a biscuit." Even the Aussie slip fielders were in hysterics.

David Hookes V's Tony Greig

The Centenary Test in Melbourne 1977. A young David Hookes makes his way to the crease in his debut test. The English captain was South African born Tony Greig. Greig : "When are balls going to drop sonny" Hookes : "Don't know but at least I'm playing Cricket for my own country"

Freddie Trueman & Raman Subba Row

The Fearsome English fast bowler Fred Trueman extraced an edge from the batsman, which flew straight into the hands of Raman Subba Row at first slip. The ball however went right between Row's legs to the third man boundary. Fred didn't say a word. At the end of the over, Row ambled past Trueman and apologised sheepishly. "Sorry Fred. I should've kept my legs together". Trueman retorted in classic fashion "Not you, son. Your mother should've!"

Mark Waugh V's Adam Parore

Mark Waugh standing at second slip, the new player (Adam Parore) comes to the crease playing & missing the first ball. Mark - "Ohh, I remember you from a couple years ago in Australia. You were crap then, you're useless now".Parore- (Turning around) "Yeah, that's me & when I was there you were going out with that old, ugly sl*t & now I hear you've married her.

Viv Richards v Greg Thomas

This incident took place during a county championship match between Glamorgan and Somerset. Glamorgan paceman Thomas had beaten the bat a couple of times and informed Richards: "It's red, round and weighs about five ounces, in case you were wondering." The very next ball was given the King Viv treament and smashed out of the ground, into a river - at which point Richards piped up: "Greg, you know what it looks like. Now go and find it."

Hansie Cronje V's Ian Healy

In one of the tour matches in South Africa, Australia played Hansie Cronje's province. Cronje was at the non strikers end, there was a short chubby batsman on strike. Ian Healy yelled to Warne, (I think) "Bowl a Mars Bar half way down...We'll get him stumped" The Aussies and Cronje were all in hysterics. the batsman's retort: "Nah, Boonie fielding at short leg will be onto it before I can move."

Robin Smith V's Merv Hughes:

During 1989 Lords Test Hughes said to Smith after he played and missed: "You can't bat". Smith to Hughes after he smacked him to the boundary: "Hey Merv, we make a fine pair. I can't bat and you can't bowl."

Adam Parore and Daryll Cullinan:

Because Cullinan is well known for being Warne's bunny, New Zealand keeper Parore greeted the South African, carefully playing the first ball from kiwi Chris Harris, with a cry of: "Bowled Warnie!"

Shane Warne V's Paul Collingwood:

Shane Warne was bowling to Paul Collingwood in the Ashes series and after Collingwood had swept and missed on several occasions;Warne muttered to Gilchrist “For Christ sake this guy can't hit anything”. Collingwood must of heard this remark because he said ” Hey Warnie do you want to say that to my face or do you want to send me a text message like you did to those other hookers”

Barmy Army Vs Shane Warne:

England's "Barmy Army" recently decided to sledge leg spinner Shane Warne musically, and it has been described as boorishly personal, but effective. The sledge was based on Chirpy Chirpy Cheep Cheep - the "Where's your poppa gone?" Song. It has been converted to " Where's your missus gone?" (Warne had recently been divorced.)

Inzamam-ul-Haq

Inzamam-ul-Haq once told Brett Lee to " stop bowling off spinners".

Merv Hughes v Javed Miandad

The big fella popped up again with another classic, this time in the 1991 Adelaide Test against Pakistan. Hughes was less than impressed when Javed called him a "fat bus conductor" as the pair squared up to one another. A few balls later, Hughes got his man and as Javed walked past, could not resist shouting "Tickets, please!"

James Ormond and Mark Waugh:

James Ormond had just come out to bat on an ashes tour and was greeted by Mark Waugh.

Mark : Mate, what are you doing out here, there's no way you're good enough to play for England"

James: "Maybe not, but at least i'm the best player in my family."

Waugh Vs Jamie Siddons:

In a Sheffield Shield game between NSW and SA, a Waugh twin (not sure which) was taking an enternity to take guard, asking the umpire for centre, middle and leg, two legs - the whole lot. Then he steps away towards leg side and has another look around the field, before re checking centre. Jamie Siddons is at slip, and decided enough is enough. He yells out. "For christ sake, it's not a test match." Waugh replies: " Of course it isn't … You're here. "

Mother (in law) of all sledges:

In the 1980's Ian Botham returned early from a tour of Pakistan, and on radio joked "Pakistan is the sort of country to send your mother in-law to." Needless to say the Pakistanis did not find this amusing, and when Pakistan defeated England in the 1992 World Cup Final, Aamer Sohail told Ian Botham " Why don't you send your mother-in-law out to play, she cannot do much worse."

Steve Waugh and Parthiv Patel

Amidst all the hype surrounding his farewell match, Steve Waugh had to contend with an unexpected dose of his own medicine from a player half his age. As Waugh fought a grim battle to stave off defeat in the series-deciding fourth Test in Sydney, 19 year-old Indian wicket-keeper Parthiv Patel tried to unsettle the veteran batsman through some banter.

The baby-faced Patel egged on the 48 year-old stalwart to play one of his sweep shots one last time.
The India 'keeper was saying, 'Come on, just one more of the famous slog-sweeps before you finish'

Waugh replied: 'Look, show a bit of respect. You were in nappies when I debuted 18 years ago'.

Trueman and a Aussie batsman:

In an England v Australia Test during early 1960's Trueman was fielding close to the gate from the pavilion. As a new batsman came out he turned to shut the gate, Trueman said " Don't bother son, you won't be out there long enough."

Daryll Cullinan and Shane Warne:

As Cullinan was on his way to the wicket, Warne told him he had been waiting 2 years for another chance to humiliate him. " Looks like you spent it eating ," Cullinan retorted.

Adam Parore and Daryll Cullinan

Because Cullinan is well known for being Warne's bunny, New Zealand keeper Parore greeted the South African, carefully playing the first ball from kiwi Chris Harris, with a cry of: " Bowled Warnie!"

Flintoff Vs Tino Best:

Best, never short of a word or two when he is bowling, was done up like a kipper by the England all-rounder as West Indies slumped to defeat in the first Test.

Flintoff saw his opponent preparing to face Giles' off-spin and shouted: " Watch the windows, Tino!" The wind-up had the desired effect, causing Best to come charging out of his crease like a man possessed. He took a wild swing at the ball, missed and was promptly stumped by Geraint Jones. Not a broken window in sight. Flintoff could not contain himself and spent the next five minutes giggling like a teenager, as Best sat on the balcony rueing his stupidity.

Viv Richards to Gavaskar:

Gavaskar had decided to relinquish his opening position and come in at no 4 for that test. But, Malcolm Marshall fired out Anshuman Gaekwad and Dilip Vengsarkar for ducks, setting the stage for Gavaskar to walk in at 0/2. And he thought there would be less pressure! Viv Richards says "Man, it don't matter where you come in to bat, the score is still zero."

Dropped the Cup?

Perhaps the most famous sledge in a World Cup match took place the epic Super Six clash between: Australia and South Africa (in 2004). South Africa looked on course to a routine victory with Australian captain Steve Waugh at the crease and on 56. At that stage, Waugh clipped the ball in the air straight to South African fielder Herschelle Gibbs. In his haste, Gibbs dropped the ball when attempting to throw it in the air in celebration as he had not fully controlled it.

As he passed him, Waugh is said to have asked Gibbs: " How does it feel to have dropped the World Cup?". Waugh carried on to make an unbeaten 120 and Australia posted an unlikely win and won the World Cup a few days later.

Waugh has however denied that quote, instead claiming that he said " looks like you've dropped the match".

Merv Hughes Vs Cronje Merv:

Hughes was one of the greatest exponents of the fine "art" of sledging. Once during a tour game in South Africa Hughes was bowling to Hansie Cronje . It was an especially flat wicket and Cronje was hitting Hughes for fours and sixes all over the place.
After the umpteenth boundary, Hughes headed down the pitch, stood near Cronje, let out a fart and said: "Try hitting that for six." It was five minutes before the guffawing stopped and play could resume.

Sachin Tendulkar Vs Abdul Qadir:

The year was 1989, the little master had recently made his debut in Pakistan.

Sachin not even old enough to get a driving licence. Sachin Tendulkar was facing the best bowlers in the business. As the Pakistani crowds jeered and mocked Sachin holding out the placards saying "Dudh Pita Bhachcha ..ghar jaake dhoodh pee", (hey kid, go home and drink milk), Sachin sent the then young leg spinner Mustaq Ahmed hiding for cover (he had hit two sixes in one over. The frustaded mentor of Mustaq Ahmed the legendary Abdul Qadir challenges Sachin saying "Bachchon ko kyon mar rahe ho? Hamein bhi maar dikhao" ("Why are you hitting kids? Try and hit me."). Sachin was silent, since then we all have come to know that he lets his bat do the talking. Abdul Quadir had made a simple request and Sachin obliged, and how. Sachin hit 4 sixes in the over, making the spinner look the kid in the contest. The over read 6, 0, 4, 6 6 6, …and a legend was born.

I am sure there are loads more out there,just fill in the comment form below with your sledge and I wll added it to the list. Please mind your language!!!